We've gotten press releases from both Kristen Stewart AND Rupert Sanders about the fallout from Twi-Gate (has anyone called it Twi-Gate yet? Because we're calling it that). But what of the aggrieved Robert Pattinson? Thankfully, GQ got an exclusive first look at R-Pattz's forthcoming public statement on the matter.
What's that? Kristen cheated on me? Seriously? Oh man. Oh God. Oh man. Oh God oh man oh God oh man. I feel so...
[squints really hard to simulate crying]
She seemed so happy, you know? Except for when she was pouting and refusing to talk, which I guess she did a lot. Was it something I did? I just wanna...
[bites bottom lip to simulate anger]
I feel so... What's that feeling where someone is loyal to you and then they're suddenly not loyal? I feel unloyaled to.
[stares wistfully into camera with mouth partially open]
I can't take this right now.
[stares down at the floor at an angle to simulate deep thought]
I remember when we first met, you know? And I was like, "Hi, I'm Rob." And she was like, "Ummm." And I was like, "Yeah." And she was like, "Ummm." And then I was like, "Ummm." And she was like, "Yeah." You don't make that kind of connection with someone every day, you know? So for her to go out and cheat on me with Walt Disney... I don't know how to react to that other than...
[runs hand through immaculate hair]
I have such great fans, you know? They're great.
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**So I guess this was made by GQ as a joke?
Well, it was kinda funny...
47 comments:
Yes you do Rob, you have the best Fans!! We fucking love you!!!!
"She seemed so happy, you know? Except for when she was pouting and refusing to talk, which I guess she did a lot. Was it something I did? I just wanna..."
MFAO!!!
ANd the BLINKING!!! OH GOD THE BLINKING!!!
FUCKING RIGHT WE FUCKING LOVE HIM.....GAHHHHHHH!!!
I did giggle at the "Ummmms..." and the "Yeahs..." LOL But I'll admit I was nervous to open this...☺
Tehee classic!
I know this is highly cynical, but a bit of me hopes scummit go into PR recovery mode and release the 7 minute clip (not off an iphone), to get the fans back on board...
http://rlv.zcache.com/im_not_evil_im_morally_disadvantaged_card-p137839113806893869en8bb_210.jpg
yes - we do love him very much! He is very loveable - sexy, goodlooking and kind....I could go on and on and on and on........HOT! HOT! HOT!
I just learned about this this morning. It was a huge punch in my gut. I am so glad my life is so crazy and busy right now (both myself and my husband are looking at MAJOR career changes right now)... or I would have gone into a full-fledged depression.
I have stuck up for Kristen so long, and given her the benefit-of-the-doubt for so many of her actions.... now I feel like an idiot for not seeing through her all along. I have to admit though, that she often did things to rub me wrong, but I just ignored it and supported her anyway.
I can not believe the hate that I am feeling for her and the sorrow that I am feeling for Rob.
I hope Kristen's career suffers immensely and she is shunned by Hollywood completely... unfortunately Hollywood works in mysterious ways, and she may not get the crucifixion she deserves. All I know is that I will continue to support and love Rob with all of my heart. On the other hand I will not watch another movie that Kristen is in and I will quietly pray that she suffers all the heartbreak that she has caused.
WHO THE FUCK WOULD DO THIS??? TO ROB ESPECIALLY??? I CAN'T EVEN FIND A THOUGHT PROCESS FOR WHAT SHE DID.... KIND OF LIKE, I CAN'T FIND A THOUGHT PROCESS FOR SOMEONE WHO COULD BEAT, TORTURE, RAPE OR KILL..... THAT IS HOW BAD THIS IS!!!!!
I am not in denial, and I AM NOT trying to stick up for Kristen, but something is a little off.....
Kristen saw the photogs and looked right at them... and she was driving her mini (which she says she never does because she is spotted in it too often)... Lots of pics here: foforks.com.br
She is either evil and did this for some unintelligible reason... or this has been staged for some ridiculous PR reason.
What does everyone think? This is so fucking weird, I'm having a hard time wrapping my brain around all of this.
Also... what date did her an Rupert do this? I think I read July 17... 2012... right????
I agree with starB. Something simply didn't add up. If it had happened on the 17th, why not have it published the next day. Why wait a few days later. And then what about the was rumour of explicit sex life of both of them. Coincidentally a week before the meltdown.
And we're talking about Kristen Stewart. She knows her every movement being watched and photographed. And to do it on a broad day light and public places? Either she's stupid or she'd done it before and got away with it. I don't know. She's not some skank or Kim Kadarshian. Can any of you detect anything rotten throughout SWATH production n promotion. I'm sure if there's anything going on between them, no matter how good they are at hiding it, somebody would know about it. There's none. So WHY? Are they telling us something.
I definitely see the points you are making. But the paparazzi have lens that can snap a pic from far away and if Kristen is just looking around and the photog is continuously snapping it will look like she's starring right at them.
If this is a stunt, it's a fucked up stunt and cruel as HELL.
These pix where taken on 7/17. The day the earth stood still.
I'm so sad and confused.
I woke up in a bad mood and now I'm over at BDM.org fighting too bitches. I feel alittle better. *evil grin*
I forget they don't sit in the same pose for mintues at a time, lol
I might just lose my ever loving mind if this ends up being a stunt! I can't even imagine what the benefit would be???
I'm still sad, confused and curious, too...♥
I know what you mean...I still can't find any reason in my mind that would justify her actions....if she wanted to break upnwith Rob, then just break up...why the fuck do you have to involve a married man with children? As for him...don't get me started...he is scum and I will not watch anything he directs, even if it's Fifty Shades! (BTW...that doesn't even get me tingly anymore)...
I feel the same way... no tingles from anything that R/K are connected to. I don't even know if I will be able to watch BD2.... how in the fuck are they going to be able to do promos/press for it?......
I am a huge conspiracy theorist, so sorry if this sounds like denial (I swear it's not... I'm totally prepared to shit all over Kristen for doing this to Rob).........
But..... this could be a stunt to bury Scummit in the mud.... there are some great telephoto lenses, but the pics at foforks.com.br are so damn clear and I think it is very interesting that they say 'kristenstewart.org' (or something like that) on the bottom of the pics...
They may really hate Summit and want to ruin them... this is certainly going to work..... the press that is supposed to begin in a couple months, certainly will not go smoothly now....
Hollywood is one fucked up place. LOL
LMFAO!!!!
I'm just dying in this MOFING HEAT!!!
And preparing for my son's bday tomorrow. today I'm bringing cupcakes to his school so Im running like a twat all over town LOL
Well, I'll be back later to help you attack some brainless bitches! I love you with my unemployed ass and all LOL!!!
YAH!! Happy Birthday to your lil' man!!!
Mmmmmm...cupcakes. You are so domestic. *licks lips*
Don't worry. The bitch says she's coming here tomorrow morning at 9am EST. So glad she gave me a proper time so I can tidy up the place a bit. LOL
Stay cool!
Look who else is wet. You are not alone!
http://farm3.staticflickr.com/2426/3783968393_88c5710b24.jpg
How do we move on frm here? I simply cannot imagine Rob with anyone else xcept Kristen. And I dont think i wanna watch BD2 and anything to do with them. Too heart wrentching. It would not be so bad if Kristen is such a skank, but she's not. That's why it hurts so bad. WHY?? Do you all think we can ever recover this heartbreak?
Right? I just read today that they are expected to appear TOGETHER for the MTV Movie awards as soon as Sept 9! That will be brutal for both or either of them that do show up. I would give Rob a standing ovation and boo Kristen's cheating ass off the stage!
Some bitches in HW would have to be cut if this is some sick joke! ARGH!
I'm really hoping they send Rob & Taylor out together for tours, premieres, promos!! I WOULD SERIOUSLY LOVE THAT! I'll be going to see BD2, but I'm going to have to watch my snarling-out-loud everytime she pops on screen...☺lol
Then I'll be mad at Kristen for going along with it! DOUBLE ARGH!!! ♥
This is where I feel like we're getting right now...
So as I move through the range of emotions over this tragedy, (I actually cried for Rob's broken heart today!) I realized something....Kristen Stewart may very well be the best actress of our time! Why? Well, I now believe that over the past 4 years she has managed to ACT the role of loving , but shy, girlfriend and fool all of us along with Rob, various producers, directors (Rupert Excluded), cast and crew members and their families. She saw the potential fame for Rob and jumped on that train as fast as she could...now that she can support movies on her own, she kicked him to the curb, in the most cruel and heinous way possible. Sorry, but I am in pissed mode right now thinking about how much Rob loved, adored and supported her when everyone else was putting her down. I don't know how this is going to play out but for today, this is what I think & feel.
You know that are scrambling their asses off right now figuring out what to do! I'm sure there are some people who will boycot going to see BD Pt2 because of Kristen's actions - that will hit Scummit right in the wallet - maybe they'll withhold some of her pay for damages! LOL!
That would be fun to see R & T...but still not the same. The premiere is going to be AWKWARD!
This BTB needs to vent some anger...which post????
He probably cried. Don't you want to hunt her down and punch her if she made him cry?! I don't know what to say about this scandal other than he won't have any trouble filling his bed.
It was the new Bella Poster post over on BDM.org. I have to warn you it's a looooong fight. LOL
The bitch was insulting the BTB site, America and it went on and on. She said our site only had 3 commenters and to have my minons ready. I don't have minons, I have bad ass BTBs!!!!!! She thought I was a blogger for Rob's Closet. Just shows how much she knows. LOL
She said she was going to come here this morning at 9am. But she's a no show...I knew it.
Found it! You go BTB! I'll continue reading that at work for some shits & giggles! Maybe throw in a word or two...
Have at it! That cunt is crazy and I don't mean BTB crazy I mean throw her in a pit and burn crazy!!
Feel so bad for Rob!! He is a great person. She made her bed.... now, hope that Rob has tons of girls all over him.... let her see what she has lost. I'm sure BTB would be happy to help! ;)
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